Honey on a Vine
by Scarlet Heir
Summary: Rated for language. Kagome is in america, and ordes a dog via e-mail. But what she gets is Inuyasha. Why is this story called Honey on a vine? Why am i writing this? I have no clue. But if you need a good laugh, feel free to join in and celebrate with us.
1. New Pet

okay, so it's another story. so sue me.  
  
or not.  
  
not that you'd get much anywayz  
  
Not mine. wish it was though. Inuyasha.  
  
Belongs to creator.  
  
Rumiko Takahashi.  
  
Now... Time for the story.  
  
Prepare to laugh your butts off.   
  
An inhailer should be kept handy for those of you with breathing problems.  
  
Anti-Southerners aren't going to like me, or this, 'cause it's based in cleveland Tn.  
  
Kikyo lovers, you are goin' to hate me too.  
  
Kay.   
  
Enough with the A/N and to the story!  
  
It all started when I ordered a puppy through the internet. I got him really cheap, only $20, from this internet company called Taiyoukai. manaed by a friend of mine named Sesshomaru. I guess that's why I got a discount.  
  
So, anywayz, when he came in a crate that was my size, i figured that it was just a very BIG puppy.   
  
Then I opened it.  
  
I screamed, of course.   
  
This is what I saw, I saw a nearly naked boy, with dog ears.   
  
He was cute, though. Very cute. More like hot.   
  
He was hotter than any guy in town, and he was mine.   
  
His ears twitched in a verry cute way, I noticed after i got over the initial shock of buying a human.  
  
I figured, Why not? His ears.   
  
My hands twitched in anticipation of touching them.   
  
I live in a trailerpark, you see. which means I don't see many pets.   
  
Which also means I love any animal that I can get my hands on.   
  
Ask my cat, Buyo.   
  
Anywayz, I am scratching the guy's ears, when he wakes up. He purrs.   
  
I didn't thik dogs could purr, Maybe he was a cat.   
  
Then he started gowling.  
  
Nope, It's a dog alright.  
  
Well, Anyways. he wakes up and stares at me like I'm a ghost. Which makes me want to laugh.  
  
His ears are twitching, and he's sniffing the air, I can tell cause his nose is twitching.  
  
Then he looks at me really weird, and asks me who I am.  
  
"Kimera Night, But you can call me Kagome." I looked at him funny, then i asked him what his name was, and he told me it was Inuyasha.   
  
That's funny, I thought that inuyasha mean Dog Demon.  
  
Then my brother Naraku pulled up.   
  
Yup, My brother is Naraku, his real name is nathan, but everybody calls him Naraku. He's older than me by about twelve years. which makes him 28, 'cause i'm 16.  
  
I don't like Naraku, he grates my nerves. He always has I guess.   
  
I see that Inuyasha is wearing a pair of red loose pants, kinda like the ones my great great great great gandpa used to wear. I saw it in a photograph once. In fact, this boy looked exactly like my great great great great grandpa did. Except without the prayer beads.   
  
This guy was wearing a spiked chain, and a pendant.   
  
Really cute.  
  
He had three hoops in his right ear, and a stud in his left, the three hoops would jingle now and then. His ears twitched so wildly, I had to laugh.   
  
He loked at me weird again then, he grabbed me and jumped onto the crate.  
  
I noticed he had claws. Kinda like mine were before I had them filed. I have to file them every day so that i'll look normal, though i'm not.  
  
As the wind blew a scent up to me from the feild in front of our trailer, i caught the scent of honeysuckle.   
  
Then my brother walked onto the porch.   
  
See, this really funny thing happened when he did, Both me and Inuyasha growled at him.   
  
We looked at each other, then nearly fell off the crate laughing.  
  
"Nice new playmate you got there little sis, has Kikyo seen him yet?" he asked. Then walked inside to see my grandma. She dont like him that much either.  
  
Kikyo is my arch nemisis. She puts a shame to the name trailerpark slut. She has slept with every male in te neighborhood, from the time that they hit puberty, and on up to 80. I think she's nastey, but that's just me.  
  
Speaking of the bitch, she came around the corner.  
  
We look a lot alike. It's just that i have ethics, and a brain, and a heart. which she has none.   
  
We cant stand eachother, and the only time she comes over, is when there is a guy at our house. She just happens to be the trailerpark trash of the trailerpark.   
  
We live in a crummy, overpriced, two-bit trailerpark, but that's about as good as it gets.  
  
"C'mon, Inuyasha, let's go inside, i want to show you something." I whispered in is ear.  
  
He nodded and carried me, Bridal style, to my room.   
  
I was so tickled by Kikyou's look, and the fact that I just got carried into my own house and i wasn't hurt.  
  
He looked at me funny again.  
  
"Where do you come from?" I asked curiously.  
  
"New York." he said.   
  
"No, I mean your family line, Where does your family come from?"I ask him, getting annoyed.  
  
"We come from Japan."Inuasha said. smiling a me. I realize that i love his smile.  
  
"Cool, so do we. That's neat."  
  
"Feh." he snorted.  
  
What as that? It is cute. you have to admit.  
  
"So, how'd you get into the crate."   
  
He just looked at me.  
  
And looked...  
  
and looked...  
  
and looked...  
  
Finally, I got tired of him looking at me and i threw my book, that just happens to be on my bedside table, at him, hitting him in the face.  
  
"Hey! What'd you do that for wench?!" He yelled.  
  
"Dont you call me a wench. My name is Kagome! KA..GO..ME..! Get it!" I hit him over the head with my pillow.  
  
Then he got this scary gleam in his eye and gabbed another pillow.   
  
Then war broke loose.   
  
Finally there was feathers in the air and everything. I was catching my breath while Inuyasha sat in front of me, watching me closely.   
  
"Yes?" I asked, though i was still breathing hard trying to surpress my giggles at his twitching ears.  
  
He poked my shoulder and whispered in my ear.  
  
"Tag, You're it!" He sped out of my room and down the hall, running over my brother and the slut in the process, and out the front door.  
  
"Inuyasha i'll get you!!!" I yelled, running out the door.  
  
Okay, I know, Inu was a bit ooc, so was Kag. And Naraku and kikyo. but so what? It's an AU. Plus it's not the seerious stuff that i normlly write, like character deaths or anything. so it's great.   
  
Oh, and BTW, I actually based this in my trailrpark. and if you have never had honeysuckle honey, then i pity you. that is the best honey you dont have to buy. it actually grows in the way overgrown downhil slope that i the feild.   
  
The only reason it wasn't rennovated was 'cause he hill was soo steep. Its a pain to climb, but the lackberies are worth it. We have the best blackberry bushes this side of cleveland. The feild is full to the brim with honeysuckle vines and blackbery bushes.   
  
Oh, and ps, I hate my brother. the first one. (I have 6, most don't live with us though, just the one i hate.) GRR at insolent little brother  
  
Sorry for any errors, but i don' have spellcheck and i'm too lazy to read my own work. Grinns  
  
Review review review!   
  
Or as my cousin Dan would say:  
  
"Okay, yall, git to reviewin' now, ya' hear?" 


	2. Birthday surprise

o.O   
  
People liked it?   
  
Cool.  
  
I figured that you would complain about the jumpiness.  
  
Oh well.  
  
Kimera: Hey, Scarlet, Put Inuyasha on steroids.  
  
No!  
  
Kimera: Why not?  
  
Because it wouldn't fit, for one thing, and for another, Inuyasha on steroids is a scary thing. especially if he goes full demon.  
  
Inuyasha: Hey, what's steroids?  
  
...  
  
Kimera: ....  
  
...  
  
Kagome: Hey, scarlet, wat's going on?  
  
Inu: Hey, Kagome? What's Sterioids?  
  
EEP!  
  
Kimera: eep.  
  
Both auther and Kimera run as Kagome chases them with a flaming frying pan.  
  
I wont get to finish if you kill me!  
  
Kagome stopps.   
  
Sigh   
  
Picks up papers, shuffles them  
  
Okay!  
  
I'm gonna try something new.  
  
I'm gonna do a reviewer response thingie.  
  
So here it is.....  
  
Blood-of-Rage - O.O Thankies, I tried. I will explain how he got in the crate in this Chapter.  
  
FireyDemonFox - O.O Thankies, I tried. I guess i am planning a few new chappies, thanks for urging me on...   
  
sister-rosette - O. I read it during math class, i thought it was funy. Thankies for the review.   
  
Now, I'd like to thank all of you who have stuck by me hrough all of the spelling errors in the first chapter. Now All you non reviewing peoples should be ashamed of yourself.   
  
Hands big cookies to the reviewers so far.  
  
If I didn't get your review, then I'll get it in the next chapter.   
  
K.  
  
Now on to the story!!!  
  
When i finally caught up o him, he was standing at the top of one of the few trees that the evil Trailerpark owners hadn't killed yet and was staring down at me.  
  
I really don't understand why he likes to stare at me soo much, but he does.  
  
"Come on!" I yell up at him. I know he hears me, he just done listen.  
  
He jst smirked at me.  
  
He SMIRKED at ME!  
  
I used my toes to pick up a rock, and threw it at him.   
  
I have pretty good aim.   
  
It startled him, and he fell out of the tree, i think that he broke half of the branches on the way down.   
  
The only bad part was....  
  
...he landed on me.  
  
'Ouch.'  
  
So anyway, when i finally got him off of me, Kikyo had found us.  
  
'o great.' i thought.  
  
Just then, Kimera Diablos pulls up.   
  
You see, Kimera hates Kikyo even more than i do, and here's the thing, Kimera is in to the whole brute strength thing. Which is good for me, considering that she is one of my best freinds and all.  
  
Kimera almost runs over Kikyo, then she jumps out of the car and jumps on her.  
  
Litterally JUMPS on her.  
  
Kimera is a little overweight, which means that she could kill Kikyo by just sitting on her, if she did it right.  
  
Anywayz, Then Kimera starts punching Kikyo in the face as me and Inu look on in horror.   
  
Inside i'm laughing, but outside i am just staring.  
  
I guess that's how i am, i dont really do what i feel like doing, just what i think is right.  
  
Anywayz, so when Kimera is satisfied, she picks the now bloodied Kikyo up by the shirt collar, and throws her into the tree.  
  
Inuyasha just stares at Kimera while i look at Kikyo.  
  
Finally i ger over the sight of kikyo in a tree, and i introduce Inu to Kimera.  
  
"But, I thought that..."  
  
"Both our names are Kimera, tht's why i go by Kagome. It saves time."I said. resisting the urge to iggle at the cute look of confusion on his face.  
  
"So where's your puppy Kagome?" asked kimera. She was wearing something that made her look kinda slutty, red shirt with a low neckline and miniskirt and all.  
  
I pointed at Inuyasha .  
  
he stared at me.   
  
"WOULD YOU STOP STARING AT ME?!!?" I yell hurting my ears  
  
"QUIT YELLING!" Kimera yells at me. She had demon hearing too. It was just on er mother's side that the demon traits were contributed from.   
  
Just then, Naraku comes out of grandma's house and we freeze.   
  
Kimera doesn't like Naraku.   
  
In fact, He hates her.  
  
But here's the thing...  
  
...Kimera hates Naraku more han she hates Kikyo, She tends to attack him on sight.  
  
Kimera ran for Naraku, and Naraku ran for the safety of his car.  
  
Kimera beat him to it.  
  
She tackled him, reminding me of a football play.   
  
He hit the dirt hard.   
  
Here's the other thing, Kimera is a witch.   
  
She slipped a beaded necklace around his neck and let him up.   
  
Then, when Naraku called Kimera a slut,  
  
She's very sensitive.  
  
She yelled a word i hadn't thought of to use as a key word.  
  
"SIT!"   
  
See here's the thing,   
  
My brother dove head first into the concrete.  
  
I laughed.  
  
And lauged  
  
And laughed.  
  
Inuyasha just walked away from me to jump back up into the tree as Kiko fell out.  
  
After i caught my breath,  
  
after my brother was gone,  
  
I decided to call up the jackass who sent me Inuyasha as a puppy.  
  
"Come on Inuyasha, Kimera, Let's go to my house."  
  
"Hello?" A female voice answered.  
  
"April?" I asked.  
  
"Mmhm." she said sleepily.  
  
"Can i speak to fluffy?" I asked her.  
  
"Sure, here he is."   
  
You see, here was where i was going to calmly ask him why he had sent a hanyou instead of a dog, but here's what really happened...  
  
"What knd of lam joke do you think you are pullin' Sess?" I yell into the reciever as soon as he answered.  
  
I could just hear him arching his eyebrow.  
  
I twitched.  
  
Then i hung up on him, grabbed my car keyes, and ran out the door to my car, Inuyasha in tow.  
  
Today was my birthday, you see, and i dont like to be aggravated on my birthdays.   
  
In fact, I hate birthdays.  
  
So when i got to Sesshies house, i screetched to a stop.   
  
Kinda throwing Inuyasha against the windsheild.  
  
And stormed into the house, where i proceeded then to fall and nock myself out cold.  
  
I am real smart.  
  
Note the sarcasm.  
  
Anywayz, so when i came to, i was surrounded by a lot of people. which made me think that i was in a hospital.   
  
I have bad experiences with needles. Ask the last guy who tried to give me a shot.  
  
I think he's still in the hospital.  
  
oops.  
  
I look around and as it turns out, they have thrown me a surprize party.  
  
I played right into their hands on this one.  
  
My eye twitched involunarily. then i forced it to stop.  
  
I saw Sesshomaru standing beside April above me...  
  
now, normally i'm not he violent type at all, i guess it's the Demon blood that runs through my blood.  
  
Or it could have just een that i was super pissed.  
  
I punched him in the face.  
  
Then, i promptly passed out again.   
  
Thank you Vertigo.  
  
Well, when i came to again, Sesshie had a bloody nose, and people were inching toward the door.  
  
Well, since the party WAS for me, i smiled and got up.  
  
Yawning, i put my hand to the back of my head, there was a big not.  
  
ow.  
  
Did i mention that i hated birthdays.  
  
So when i cracked a smile, peoples stayed.  
  
And we partied.  
  
And i finally found out how Inuyasha had gottn in the crate.  
  
He had been suffed in it in the dawn hours, and had been brought over to my house.   
  
I didn't get mad at him, 'cause he punched Sesshie too.  
  
I saw Kimera over beside Sano. His real name was Shane Kojenski, But everbody calls him Sano.  
  
The were aweful cute together.  
  
I walked outside for some air.  
  
That cologne really stinks to someone who has a dog's sense of smell.  
  
And inuyasha comes out to join me.  
  
He holds my hand as we stare into the full moon.  
  
He begins to inch closer to me,   
  
I hope he will kiss me.  
  
But before i find out what was going to happen...  
  
Shippou and Koga threw a very heavy stack of shingles, and Shipou on his head.  
  
shippou had accidentally gotten mixed in wiht the shingles.  
  
I groaned.  
  
then the next day,   
  
I had spent the night at Shesshies  
  
Kimera comes over in her brother's hot rod. which meant one thing.  
  
Mudding.  
  
Okay, that's it for his chappie. next one will be hilarious.  
  
then i introduce Inu to Honey Suckles.  
  
Much chaos and funnness.  
  
Yayness.  
  
Okay yall, git to reviewing already! 


	3. Payback is hell

Okay yall, I'm back from the pitts of hell to deliver another passsage of comdy.  
  
Translaion  
  
Okay, I'm back you guys, time for another chapter.  
  
I cant belive my last chaper was 6 pages lone! The most i have ever written is 4 pages!  
  
Okay, nywayz, Here is the only reviewer response for last chapter.  
  
crazylittledemongirlwhowantstotakeovertheworld- Thanks, i hope you like the next chapters as much as you liked that one.  
  
Okay, now to all of you non reviewing peoples:  
  
SHAME ON YOU!!!!  
  
If yo guys want to see the next chappie, then you'd better review.  
  
And belive me when i say that i wont update, Isn't that right, Naraku?  
  
Naraku: Looking up from Sleepless in seattle book Hugh?  
  
Never mind.  
  
Inuyasha: Ha ha ha, Nagaku got the sit spell instead of me! Ha ha ha!  
  
All: Stares at Inuyasha with evil gleam in eye.   
  
Hey, Kagome, He hasn't read farher into the script yet has he?  
  
Kagome: Nope.   
  
Figures.  
  
Well, anywayz, on with the story.  
  
88  
  
I look out the window and i see Kimera pulling up in her brother's truck, with te bass up on high.  
  
I smile.   
  
Payback time.  
  
"Hey, Sesshomau, Koga, Shipou, Inuyasha?" I yell out the door of my room.  
  
"Hn?" Inuyasha says as they come toward me.  
  
"How would you guys like to take a drive with me and Kimera?" They are new here. Strait from New York. They have to learn somehow.  
  
"Sure!"   
  
When we are in Kimera's truck, she takes off. I wrap my legs instinctively arund the bar weilded under the seat.  
  
Kimera locks the doors to the back as we arrive at the track.  
  
The track is really just a giant mud hole that everyone just goes mudding in and has contests in, Kimera's truck was made for the track. It even has a pole to push the car back upright. Kimera is kinda rich.  
  
Well kimera starts to do donuts and the four in the back clutch at their seats.  
  
I grin at kimera as she heads for the wall of trees near the back end of the Track, and she swerves.  
  
We go to two wheels, then back onto four, slinging mud over the already caked trees.  
  
I nod to kimera and she tips us again. I glance back at the four in the back,   
  
Sesshomaru is rying with all of his might to get his door open, Shippou is under the seat. Kouga is trying to get His door open, and Inuyasha has found the bar under his seat and is clutching to it with all of his strength. slightly bending the rod.  
  
I laugh and give kimera the thums up.  
  
Translation: Turn us on over  
  
She does.   
  
All of them end up on the roof except Inuyasha, who is still clutching onto the pole.  
  
Kimera pushes the big red button and we tip back over.  
  
Leaving all four in a pile on the floorboard.  
  
When we get back to the trailer park, We heard guns going of and a femail voice that could only be Sango.   
  
We pulled up to her trailer and watched for a gew minutes as Sango chased Miroku around her trailer with a sawed off shotgun, then i yelled out the window, drawing her attention away from the pervert.  
  
"Yo Sango!"  
  
"Hold on a sec, i'm busy." She yelled over her shoulder, not looking at us.  
  
"Sango, guess who me and Kimera have in the back?" I yell at her.  
  
she finally turns and comes over.  
  
I point to the back seat and we all turn.  
  
Sesshomaru is sitting on the floor, curled into a fetal position and rocking, chanting something that sounded like : "It's better than the well"   
  
That or "My feet like to swell."   
  
I figure that it was the first one.  
  
Inuyasha hadn't moved from when i looked back on him last, he was still clutching the bar.  
  
Kouga was digging his nails into the seat and his eyes were huge.  
  
Shippou was hugging the bar under his own seat much like inuyasha was doing.  
  
We sat there laughing as Mioku, glad for the distraction, slunk away into his house.  
  
When we finally got to my house and kimera unlocked the doors, all four men swept out of the car.  
  
While we were walking around the trailer, we walked strait into a solid wall of masculine backs.   
  
'Hey, what's he big..." A plate shattering drew my attention to the scene before them.  
  
My grandma was throwing her china at Naraku and Kikyo.  
  
"How dare you defile my house like that!!" She yelled.  
  
then threw another plate.  
  
I dodged around the four and came to a stop in front of my grandma who was about to pick uo he shikon vase.  
  
"Grandma, what happened?" i asked grabbing the jar from her hands.  
  
"Those two hentai just tried to do the nasty in my bedroom!!!" She yelled.  
  
My grandma was more than slightly crazy, and not so slightly senile.  
  
"Grandma, calm down. i'll get them." I told her, setting her down.  
  
"O Kimera." I call to my freind who had worked around the four boys and was blocking Naaku's path to his car, and Kikou's path home.  
  
"Sit SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT SIT!!!!!!!" she yelled with a malice that surprised everyone but me.  
  
He had to dig himself out of the crater.  
  
We watched as he reached down and pulled up a more than slightly smushed Kikyo.  
  
We watched as Kimera moved aside for them to leave, and Inuyasha and the others growled.  
  
Then we set to the task of cleaning up the shards.  
  
"Hey Kagome," Inuyasha whispered at me.  
  
I turned to him.  
  
"Hey kagome, What's that smell?"  
  
"Would you like me to show you?" I ask him.  
  
When he nods, i stand up, placing my shards in a small pile, and motioned for him to follow me.  
  
"Hey, Kagome, Where you guys goin'?"  
  
I just motioned to the feild.  
  
88  
  
Okay, peoples, Giddyup and show me some reviews.  
  
I want at least four, till i update. so there! Four new reviews! Flames are counted as reviews, but you have o have a point if you are flaming me. so there.  
  
Ps: i could really use some suggestions, I dont have a plot, and if this goes on for much longer, i wont be able to type. he only thin i have planned, is the next chappie. which is kinda amazing.   
  
Anyways.   
  
Back to my life, not that i have one, so you can get to reviewing.  
  
Hey, if i get thr four today, i might update tonight!  
  
Git to reviewing yall, or i will plan your next school dance in a barney theme! Mwa ha ha ha ha! 


	4. Honeysuckle Honey, and Blackberry Thorns

I guell i wont be planning your next school dance, oh well. -  
  
Sigh, Anywayz, lets get going.  
  
Inu: To where?  
  
To the verry pitts of hell so that i can chew off your ears and feed them to my pet ferrit named Kenshin.  
  
Kouga: Yay! Let's go!!  
  
How do you know that i was talking about Inu's ears?  
  
Kouga: eep!  
  
All but the author and Naraku: Run away!!  
  
He he he he, they don't know i was talking to Naraku.  
  
Naraku: Looks up from his book, tears streaming down his face. Hugh? Where'd everynoe go?  
  
Come on, Naraku, let's go.  
  
Naraku: Okay!  
  
Evil grin

Reviewer response time!!!  
  
Jen( ) - Okay, then. could you tell me, Aside from the spelling errors, and the lack of any kind of plot, what would make it better. And btw, I almost never compete anything. So there. Plus, i'm just a brainy country girl. So that means I have the privilage of putting most things off to the last moment, the only reason that i even continued, was because i get reviews. I tend to set standard review criteria, which means that i am verry erratic in my updates. Lol.-  
  
loverofInukagome - Thanks, glad you liked it, even the spelling errors didn't phase you. Yay!  
  
Blood of rage - He he he he he! You can meet up with her, she is my BF, Her Penname is Kimera Diablos, and she's on the site as an author. Well, anywayz, You have to wait for me to get done with naraku. Evil grin..  
  
Naraku: Beating on the door Let me out!! No...No .... Not that!!, NOT KIMERA!! AAAAH!  
  
Sniggers.  
  
Now, to all of you non reviewing readers...  
  
YOU SHOULD BE PLACED IN MY CLOSET AND BE MADE TO LISTEN TO THE BARNER THEME SONG OVER AND OVER UNTIL IT DROVE YOU ABSOLUTELY NUTS!!!!

Okay, while i am busy with Naraku, (Not that kind of busy, get your minds out of the gutter before i shoot them out...my gutter!! Grabs gun) - You guys read the fic.  
  
88  
  
I grabbed Inuyasha's hand and dragged him to the edge of the feild.  
  
"This is where the smell is coming from." I tell him.  
  
He looks at me like i am stupid or something, so i bnd down and grab a flowered honeysuckle blossom..  
  
..And not so gently, shoved it in his face.  
  
He looked a it. then sniffed.  
  
I laughed at the look of extacy going through hid eyes.  
  
hen i told him that you were supposed to eat it.  
  
He took it and stuffed the whole thing in his mouth. then he got this disgusted look on his face and i laughed.  
  
"Not like that, you have to open it from the bottom and suck out the honey."  
  
"I thought honey came from bees..."   
  
"Not this kind." i said, picking another one for myself.   
  
I tore off the end and pulled the stem-thingie, which made a very large drop of honey come to the end. without ulling the thing all the way out, i licked away the juice, and i pull the thingie all of the way out and lick it so tha i got all of the honey, then i suck out the interior, getting the veerry last.  
  
he watched me in utter fascination, then picked another one for himself and followed my example.   
  
Soon, we were both hyper and wanting more.   
  
"Hey, Kagome, is there any more?" he asks, looking like a starved puppy.  
  
"Only further on into the feild." I say, then i start back up toward the house.  
  
He grabs my arm and picks me up, then he asks where.  
  
"I wouldn't do that if i were you, there is blackberry bushes in the honeysuckle further in."   
  
"Which way?" he just asks.   
  
Here is the thing, Blackberry bushes have thorns on them, and Inuyasha is barefoot, I just shake my head and point.  
  
he jumps into the air, and lands...  
  
...right on a Blackberry bush.  
  
he starts hopping and jumping around in the feild, trying to find a safe place to land, All of us start laughing hysterically.   
  
He inally jumps out of th feild, and onto the yard, which is funny, cause he's still hopping,  
  
i slide our of his arms with a llittle difficulty, and push him onto his butt.  
  
"Told you." I say holding up one of his feet.  
  
There was a bunch of thorn ends caking his feet. i laughed and lengthened my nails.  
  
Ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow!!!  
  
I laugh silentl as he tosses evil glares over my shoulder at the people watching him out of the corner of their eyes.  
  
I grinn as i pull out an especially long thorn and he winces.  
  
Then i stand up, i was finished.  
  
"Come on, you're done." i say reaching for his hand.   
  
"I really hate you." He says, making my grin widen.  
  
"You wouldn't be here if you hated me, now would ya'?" I say as he grabs my hand.  
  
Inuyasha sends me this mixed look and i just look back at the others.  
  
"Hey, Shesshomaru, You want me to give you a ride home?" I heard Kimera call over to him.  
  
He just gets this really scared look on his face, and slowly starts to back away from her. His eyes big.  
  
I look at them and start grinning again.  
  
Then i ask the same question, and Sesshie ducks behind my back and nods vigorously.  
  
Grinning a Kimera, i lead the way to my beat up bug.   
  
Yes, I own a bug.   
  
It's a 73 model, and kachi, and has a jiant blue butterfly on the lid of the trunk/hood.  
  
Well, when we get back to Fluffy's mansion, he jumps out of my car and kisses the ground.  
  
Actually KISSES the GROUND!  
  
I just stare at him.  
  
Then April comes out carrying Rin, Fluffy's neice.  
  
Rin is about eight years old, and she talks in the third person, which is kinda' creepy, but kinda cute.  
  
"Rin missed you sesshomaru!" She yells, squirming out of April's hand and tackles the White haired man.  
  
"Rin, What have i told you about talking in the third person?" Fluffy scolded gently.  
  
i just stared.  
  
He was being nice, and open with this little girl.   
  
I shook it off and turned to April.   
  
"So, was payback fun?" she asked, with this look in her eyes.  
  
I nodded, then i pulled something out of my pocket.  
  
"I got pictures!" I waved them.  
  
She got this demonish look in her eyes and we made a hasty retreat to the mansion.  
  
She looked at her copies, and then sent them to be copied.  
  
Future reverence of blackmail is always fun. -   
  
I walked back out of the house and to my car.  
  
When I got back home, i saw Inuyasha Jumping around...  
  
Literally.   
  
I looked at him, then i caught sight of Sango and Kimera holding a bag of chocolate, I just looked at them, then i ran up to them  
  
I didn't stop, I just grabbed my bag, and nocked them over on my way.  
  
I'm normally not a verry violent person,   
  
But i have one rule.  
  
..DON'T Mess with my CANDY.  
  
I have this little problem with being a candy addict.  
  
88  
  
You guys got more for your four reviews than I even thought you would.  
  
I am surprised that this stor has lasted this long, without a plot and all. I am verry surprised.  
  
Now, to get the next chappie, Four more reviews. And add some suggestions as of what to do with this.  
  
I have the next chappie planned out. bt that's about it. My hands are hurting now.  
  
You know what?   
  
The only bad thing about having metal plates in your arm, (Aside from arthritis, Electricity buildup, swelling, and the general pains) Is that you cant get anything on the radio, unlesss your arm (The one with the metal in it) Is either over, or touching the radio.  
  
It get's kinda annoying after awhile.  
  
Alright yall, git to reviewing, 4 reviews! Al that review will recieve a giant Inu cutout of whoever you want from the Inu cast.  
  
Push the little blue button.  
  
Not the red one! The blue one!  
  
There ya go. 


	5. Whips and Horses, And no it's not that y...

Okay, yall here's the next chappie in our little drama.  
  
Responses time...  
  
okay now git to readin'  
  
---------------------------------------------------------  
  
"Hey! what was that for?!" Sango yelled after me.  
  
I just ran on,   
  
Inuyasha was chasing me.. and he was pretty good at it too.   
  
i put on an extra burst of energy, turned around, and stopped, ducking so that he didn't run into me, but had to jump over me. I sprinted in the opposite direction.  
  
I reached into the bag and ate a few of the chocolates, Grinning at the energy rush that immediately followed.  
  
Suddenly i saw Kimera and I had to grin...She had gone home, and was back again...this time she was in the pickup.  
  
"Yo, Kimera, you ready to go?" I asked her.  
  
At her nod, i stopped, then i turned.  
  
"Hey, You guys coming or not?" I yelled at them.  
  
"Sure!" Sango yelled back, and Inuyasha and Miroku followed her to the car.  
  
The reason Miroku wasn't scared of Kimera's driving skills, was because...  
  
Well....  
  
...his were way worse.  
  
Inuyasha decided that he would run.   
  
I agreed, and decided to keep him company.   
  
As we were running, i was reveling in the feel of the wind blowing in my face, and through my hair,   
  
I looked beside me, and i saw the miror of my own pleasure in Inuyasha's eyes.  
  
I smiled and turned my attention back to the road..  
  
..just in time to dodge a car.  
  
I kept my attention more focused until i felt Inuyasha inch closer.  
  
Suddenly my hand was in his.. and a warm giddiness was spreading through my stomach.  
  
I glanced at him and i caught his slight smile.  
  
I grinned to myself, and tightened my grip on his hand.  
  
A few minutes before we arrived, our hands seperated, and we slowed slightly.  
  
we had to wait for Kimera to get there, then i caught the scent of my idiot brother.  
  
Grinning, i called out his name, and Inuyasha tensed.  
  
"Hey, Naraku, if you do somehing for me, i won't let Kimera Sit you."   
  
"What?"   
  
"Milk Candy.."   
  
"Wha? No way!!!"  
  
"O Kimera..." i called  
  
"Okay..Okay. I'll do it." He hastily agreed.  
  
"Good, she's in the barn."  
  
He scuttled off toward the barn.  
  
Here's the thing...My brother hasn't been to Kimera's, Kimera's father and mother own a horse ranch, but they also have a cow, they named it Candy...Candy knocks anyone though a wall except for me and Kimera, that tries to milk her.  
  
Inuyasha looks at me in confusion..  
  
"Just watch."  
  
Sure enough, We heard a loud moo, and then a louder crash, and finally we saw my idiot brother flying through the air.  
  
Chuckling to myself, i watched for Inuyasha's expression.  
  
He laughed...and soon we were rollin on the ground, in a fit of giggles.  
  
Later, we were walking toward the horse pin, when Scarlet ran up to me.  
  
Scarlet is Kimera's BF, and her Horse trainer.  
  
She is my age, but has graduated already and is in colledge. she is really smart.  
  
Anyways, she ran up to me, and tackled me to the ground, screamin my name.  
  
She scares me sometimes.  
  
Anyways, she finally gets up off of me, and then she notices Inuyasha  
  
"Cute, Who is he? Is he yours?" she asked  
  
"Verry, Inuyasha Triyukai, and I wish. " I say then i notice as she just shrugs and turns back to me..  
  
"Yo, Kagome, what's up? Where's Kimera?"   
  
"She'll be here in awhile, so i thought that i would show him around" i say then i noticed that she was wearing her riding outfit.  
  
"You want to ride? You'll have to do it bare back, but Rose and Black and Star are ready." She offered  
  
"Sure!" I say, then i grabbed Inuyasha's hand and i led him to the horse pin.  
  
(Here is where i start to drool)  
  
I watched him for awhile.  
  
Inuyasha was tanned, in a tight undershirt, his long hair trailing down his back, and his ears perked up as he ran around with the horse.  
  
Inuyasha was playing with Black.  
  
Black raced him around the ring, and he dodged him, his hair streaming around him.  
  
He was slightly sweating, making his skin shine in the sun.  
  
Inuyasha stopped, and Black came up to him, Surprising contrast as Inuyasha jumped up onto the black horse.  
  
(Drool......... Imagine Jorge of the jungle scene when he is playing with the horses, now you get the jist of it.)   
  
As we were watching, Sango and Kimera joined us.  
  
Miroku was off trying to find Kimera's sister, Kali,   
  
We heard a distant smack and guessed that he had found her.  
  
Inuyasha heard it and stopped, then went over to where i was standing on the last spoke of a White fence and held out his hand for mine.  
  
As We rode aound the ring, Scarlet was snooping around in the bushes.  
  
Suddenly, we heard a loud shout of surprise as Scarlet threw out her whip and hit something,  
  
Then Kikyo ran out of the bushes.  
  
I laughed so hard that i fell off of the horse, and inuyasha soon followed.  
  
Scarlet caught the slut by her ancles and drug her toward the others...  
  
Right through a blackberry bush.  
  
she lifted the girl by her shirt collar and held her, suspended above the ground.  
  
the funny thing was, Kikyo was a demon.....  
  
...and scarlet was a full blooded HUMAN.  
  
We sat there and laughed at the distressed slut trying to pry off Scarlet's hands.  
  
"I told you that if you ever came to this place again, and i caught you, that you would be turned over to Kimera. Did i not?" Scarlet said menacingly  
  
Kikyo shook her head as best as she could.  
  
Scarlet tossed the whip to Kimera.  
  
"You hit me and you die." she said as an off comment, then held up Kikyo and ripped what some people could call a shirt, off.  
  
Kimera unfurled the whip, and ran her fingers along the length of braided leather.  
  
Kimera smiled cheerily, and cracked the whip just over Kikyo's back.  
  
"Hey scarlet, how many times have you caught her on my lands?" she called to her friend  
  
"About four times." Scarlet said grinning.  
  
"Alright! That means Fourty Hold her steady, i dont really like a moving target. Hey scarlet, would you like to take over after the first twenty?" she asked.  
  
"Sure, she broke my last saddle, so i guess that would be fair."   
  
Kikyo's eyes widened in complete terror.  
  
"You wouldn't?" she sqeaked.  
  
"Oh, we would." Scarlet hissed.  
  
"Gag her will ya'?"   
  
Scarlet let go of the demon with one hand and reached into her pocket for her bandanna.  
  
Kikyo kicked Scarlet in the stomach and ran as if her life depended on it.  
  
Scarlet held her stomach for about 30 seconds, then her aura flashed and she ran faster than I normally can and appeared in front of Kikyo, who ran into her.  
  
"Now, you die." Scarlet said, then she fully jumped on Kikyo,   
  
Scarlet placed a flury of fists into Kikyo's face until she stopped screaming and kicking, then she got off of the unconsious demon, and her aura went back to a neutral light blue.  
  
Scarlet turned to us, who had our mouths hanging open, and smiled reassuringly.  
  
"Now you know the reason that Kimera tries not to piss me off." she said, then shrugged and walked toward the now stampeding Black.  
  
"Shh, shhh, it's okay." She caught the horse by the reighn and held it there, cooing like a mother.  
  
Black calmed down and started to nuzzle her throat. she smiled lightly and closed her eyes, leaning against the horse.  
  
Black put his muzzle under her arm and tossed his head back.  
  
Scarlet went limp and crumpled to the ground.   
  
We all ran to her aid, and crowded around her as Kimera felt for the girl's pulse.  
  
"She's fine, she just feinted. Now, let's o take care of Kikyo..."  
  
We all grinned.  
  
-----------------------------------------------------------------  
  
Okay, yall, time to review. I really need suggestions for the next chapter, i have nothing else planned, so here lies my dillema.  
  
Please review, or i will send my evil blood sucking blue butterflies after you....  
  
I'm serious.  
  
See ya later.

Sorry i haven't been there for awhile, but i moved away from my grandma's house so no computer.

  
Bye.


	6. well, i'm back

i know, i know, i just had no recent activities on the internet so there!  
  
Okay, let's start off where we left off.  
  
----  
  
Last time:  
  
Scarlet went limp and crumpled to the ground.  
  
We all ran to her aid, and crowded around her as Kimera felt for the girl's pulse.  
  
"She's fine, she just feinted. Now, let's go take care of Kikyo..."  
  
We all grinned.  
  
------  
  
Okay, now for the newest installment of Honey on A Vine.  
  
We left Scarlet on the dust surrounded by the horses that had lain around her protectively, and walked slowly over to where a bloody Kikyou was moaning as she woke up.  
  
"Okay, now it's my turn." i said, an evil grin crossing my face as i picked the girl up by her collar.  
  
"Leave some for the rest of us, Kagome." Kimera said, her hands on her hips.  
  
i nodded in affermitave and i dropped Kikyou.  
  
I placed my hands above the demonic bitch and healed her.  
  
As soon as the light faded from my palms, Kikyou was up and sprinting toward the trees.  
  
Kimera held Inuyasha back and grinned at me.  
  
here's the thing, I am always one who likes a good chase, and plus, i get to show off, which is fun too.  
  
"Kikyou, you wont get anywhere at that pace!" i called at Kikyou's retreating back.  
  
Then i took off.  
  
chasing her through the trees and across streams and over undergrowth i felt my muscles working as the branches and thorns tear at my clothes.  
  
i swerved off the path that Kikyou was making and ran up beside her, a stand of trees flashing between us.  
  
"At this rate, i will have caught you with no effort at all." i half complained to the miko bitch.  
  
She put on an extra burst of speed, making me go faster.  
  
Suddenly she ran into my path and stood stone still.  
  
i tackled her without even slowing down.  
  
Suddenly i sensed someone behind me and i turned to see who it was and got blindsided.  
  
When i could see again, i found that it was Naraku.  
  
I wasn't mad, i wasn't ticked, i was PISSED!  
  
I saw black.  
  
When i came back to my senses, both Naraku and Kikyou were a bloody pulp.  
  
I felt the energy leave my legs and extremeties and suddenly i was so sleepy that i couldn't hold my eyes open.  
  
The next time i opened my eyes, my head was in Inuyasha's lap, and everything hurt.  
  
I half sat up and winced when i saw what had been done.  
  
There were several claw gashes on my legs and arms and chest, which, in turn, sredded my clothes.  
  
so i was half naked, surrounded by my friends and a perverted monk.  
  
great.  
  
and to top it off, i was injured.  
  
you know what?  
  
That whole clause with being able to heal everyone and everything with no problem, kinda' backfires when you cant heal yourself, and you cant heal others of your kind.  
  
I hate pain.  
  
i hissed through my teeth (Is there any other way?) as Scarlet dabbed at one of the gashes on my chest with a cotton swab that was probably soaked in rubbing alchohol.  
  
"Do you HAVE to do that now?" i griped.  
  
"Do you want an infection?" she countered.  
  
.....  
  
she nodded, smugly.  
  
by the time we were done, Kimera, Inu, Sango, and Miroku were holding me down.  
  
grumbling, i felt of the bandages, making sure that they were nice and tight.  
  
then, i limped toward the still unconsious Kikyou and Naraku.  
  
i kicked naraku in the side, waking him up.  
  
"Next time you even think of this again, i will kill you."  
  
"No you wont, the family loves me."  
  
"I dont think that they will miss you much." i said, kicking him again, making him grunt in pain.  
  
When we got back to the trailerpark, i went through my window to make sure that my grandma didn't see me and laid down on my bed.  
  
I didn't feel like even changing clothes, so i just went to sleep as i was.  
  
When i woke up, Inuyasha was in bed beside me, and i was in a nightdress. i knew my face went red, then i felt that my bra and undies were still the same ones as before.  
  
His arm was draped across me.  
  
i heard my grandma coming down the hall and froze.  
  
She walked in and stopped at the sight of the blood from wounds that i had torn open in my sleep.  
  
She sighed and walked back out.  
  
i hoped that she wasn't doing what I thought she was doing, but she was.  
  
She had grabbed the big chest of medical supplies and had toated it back into my room before i could find out where all of my cuts and bruises were.  
  
I squirmed and she had Inuyasha hold me down.  
  
when she was done, she went back out and came back in with a cup of steaming liquid.  
  
i drank it and felt the world start to spin.  
  
great, i'll be dead to the world for three days. was my last consious thought.  
  
When i came back down to earth, i was alone.  
  
i moved around, making sure that there was no sign of soreness before i finally stood.  
  
I knew i looked like crap, but i didn't care, i walked out of my room and into the kitchen where Inu and Kimera and my grandma were having breakfast.  
  
Buiscuts, gravy, sausage, eggs, and fried ham were for breakfast.  
  
I ignored their worried looks and walked past them, grabbing a counter here and there for support against the dizzy spells and grabbed a plate from the cabinet.  
  
Waling back over to the stove, i put the plate down and overstuffed it with food.  
  
Grabbing a spoon, i got what was left of the jelly and put it on everything that works with jelly. wich just happens to be everything but the meat.  
  
Can you tell, i like jelly.  
  
Well, you can imagine their amused faces, so i'm not going to talk about it.  
  
When i was done, i walked outside to find that the new managers still had yet to mow the feild.  
  
I closed my eyes and soaked in the sun for awhile before i jumped off the porch and sat in the swing.  
  
when Inuyasha came out, he was wearing a pink shirt and a Kilt.  
  
I fell out of my swing, i laughed so hard.  
  
------  
  
Yeah, it's a short chapter, so sue me, i have school in the morning and i have to wake up at 5 am.  
  
welcome to the world, this way is departure. 


End file.
